San Diego Chargers.
September 14, 2009.
Groan.
There once was a time—long, long ago—when a game between the Oakland Raiders and the Chargers was anticipated and relished. We would drive for hours in Washington State to find a hilltop or riverbank that would allow radio transmission as our beloved (and sometimes reviled) Silver and Black did battle with the Powder-puff Blue. Fred Dean, Louie Kelcher, Dan Fouts, Charlie Joiner, Chuck Muncie, and Don Coryell were just a few of the names that come to mind.
And now, all that comes to mind is Oakland loss upon Raider defeat:
December 28, 2003: 21-14 (loss). Bill Callahan suspended Charlie Garner and Charles Woodson before the kickoff for missing a team meeting the night before. Terrence Shaw said Callahan “was gonna take those guys down with him.” Those were fun times--ranking up there with hernias, hair loss, premature ejaculation, and uncontrolled flatulence.
October 31, 2004: 42-14 (loss). Imagine 45 Silver-and-Black players standing around waiting for someone else to make a play. Said Charles Woodson: “We’re not a good team.” No kidding, Sherlock. And, may I add, Charles: You’re no Jack Kennedy. You’re not even a Ted Kennedy.
November 21, 2004: 23-17 (loss). First Raider first-down came in the middle of the second quarter; by that time, the score was 13-0. Jerry Porter opined: “We have got (to) set our alarm clocks earlier or something.” Maybe that explains why Porter consistently sleepwalked through the first quarter of every season while he was with Oakland.
October 16, 2005: 27-14 (loss). In the first half, Chargers ran 43 plays to the Raiders’ 17 as they jumped out to a 24-7 halftime lead. Kerry Collins noted, “We just came out with a lack of execution, and they made plays. And we didn’t.” Collins did, however, complete a dozen passes to the popcorn vendor in row four.
December 4, 2005: 34-10 (loss). Down 17-10 at halftime, Raider offense was on the field for 89 seconds in the third quarter and started the fourth quarter behind 24-10. Kerry Collins: “I still feel this is my team, and I want it to be for as long as I’m here.” Newsflash, Kerry: You’re no longer “here.”
September 11, 2006: 27-0 (loss). An incredible nine sacks delivered on Raider quarterbacks. Said Barry Sims: “Monday night, home opener, division game....I’m disgusted with how we played.” This was the game where Raider-haters actually began to feel sorry for Raider fans. It is a sad day when opponents pity Raider fans.
November 26, 2006: 21-14 (loss). The infamous Illegal Forward Pass-Spin Job game. Fabian Washington: “They gave them the ball, they gave us the ball, they gave them the ball.” And this is why Raider fans give zebra officials...the finger.
October 14, 2007: 28-14 (loss). Norv Turner began his 4-0 domination of the Raiders in this game where LaDanian Tomlinson scored four touchdowns. Lane Kiffin: “We turned the ball over. We got sacks. We didn’t stop the run and we didn’t run the ball. We got penalties. We were a bad team today.” Is anyone seeing a pattern in these statements?
December 30, 2007: 30-17 (loss). JaMarcus Russell’s first start in the NFL is marred by loss. Lane Kiffin: “Yeah, JaMarcus will be our starting quarterback next season.” Yes, Lane, but where will you be next season? On your way out is the correct answer.
September 28, 2008: 28-18 (loss). Seven three-and-out possessions. Lane Kiffin: “We’re not a really good third-down team right now.” Let’s focus on those last two words. Lane Kiffin, you’re fired. Right now.
December 4, 2008: 34-7 (loss). 17% third-down rate, three turnovers, and 70 penalty yards. Nnamdi Asomugha: “We don’t play good football, we don’t play sound football, we’ve been undisciplined.” Yes, but the Raiderettes look good in their push-bras, and isn’t that worth the price of admission?
Given this bleak history, how can the Raiders break out of their spiral of visible folly?
For starters, one can always fight. In Jim Otto’s words: “We hit harder than anybody, sometimes after the whistle. Well, you can’t put a stopwatch on aggression. And if teams didn’t like the way we hit them, we hit them harder the next play.”
This Raider fan has never had a problem with unnecessary roughness penalties. Because the naughty, violating Raider is obviously playing with passion, and chances are good that they will force a fumble or break a long run later in the same game. DE Regan Upshaw won my respect when he bloodied San Diego QB Ryan Leaf’s face—and Leaf was wearing a helmet at the time. Leaf also threw two interceptions in that game, a contest won by the Raiders. See? Raider teams used to beat the Chargers.
LB Matt Millen, if he saw that the Raiders team was lackadaisical on Thursday of game week, would intentionally start a fight on the field. Coach Tom Cable seems to have taken a page from the gravedigger’s playbook when he clocked Randy Hanson. In the 1970s, a franchise playing in a lesser Oakland sport used to fight each other in the locker room while simultaneously winning three World Series rings. As long as they are winning and not assaulting female journalists, Raider fans are unconcerned whether Silver-and-Black players are punching each other.
Marty Schottenheimer said to hit Raider players in the face and they’ll cry. The 2009 Oakland Raiders have to fight for their victory. That is what it is going to take to win on September 14. San Diego believes, incorrectly, that they own the Oakland Raiders for two guaranteed wins a year. The Chargers are going to come into Oakland to take what they see as theirs. It is the Silver and Black’s job to discourage such misguided behaviour. First downs, touchdowns, and turnovers will go a long way toward making their case.
Nothing of any value in this world is earned without hardship. Raider fans have suffered unprecedented hardships these last six seasons. We know that LaDanian Tomlinson has averaged 125 yards rushing over the last eleven outings and is closing in on a full mile of yardage versus Oakland (how many yards in a mile, Raider fans?). We are aware that the Raiders have lost ten straight nationally-televised games. We know that Cliff Branch was irrelevant his first year in the league and that the Raider organization historically has brought their quarterbacks along on a four-year cycle (except for Todd Marinovich and Rusty Hilger). We are cognizant of offensive line woes, suspect run defense, and wide receiver inadequacies.
One thing Raider fans have, though, is hope. We hope for Middle East peace, economic rebound, and even universal health care (we just don’t want to pay for it). We hope that, in the telling days leading up to September 14th, Bill Romanowski will visit the Raider locker room with his black bag. We hope that, on September 15th, we can smile, turn on the radio, listen to “Kentucky Woman” or “Bark at the Moon” and tilt our head rapidly back and forth like some crazed bobblehead doll. And we can think....
Raiders bumaye.
This year.
This Raider year.
Thank you to the San Francisco Chronicle website for archival material: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/qws/as/main
Craig Parker
Author, Football’s Blackest Hole
Al-Khobar, Saudi Arabia
http://www.raiderfans.com/article.php?story=20090831210226734